Happy Middle of the Year everyone! I just cannot believe that it is already July! Totally a crazy thing about getting older! I remember being a kid and the year between Christmas’ taking forever long to be done. Same thing with summer break! Now time just flies by! I am in awe that it is already JULY! Crazy! Seems like it was just last month that we were celebrating the holidays!
We have got a busy month coming up! So much to look forward to! For the 4th of July weekend we are going to California to sit and relax on the beach. I am very much looking forward to this vacation! It’s been a very long time! Then Jamie and I are going to a marriage retreat for four days in the middle of July. I’m looking forward to that too b/c it will be just Jamie and I and we are going to Minnesota. We will be in Minneapolis, which is where The Mall of America is. I am very much looking forward to that trip! Someone told me that there is no sales tax in MN, so it should be interesting for sure!!! Our Friends Tom and Joe have birthdays on the same day so that should be one helluva party! Unfortunately we will probably not be there to participate! I wanna try to convince then to do the parties on the weekend before. Maybe I’ll secretly talk to Joe’s wife and see if we can plan a surprise party or something. :) I’m so sneaky!
Jamie also has me signed up for a stop smoking course, but we have to reschedule it b/c the class is scheduled for the day that I get back from MN.
I am a little weary of the quit smoking programs. I’d like to be a little vain and think that I am strong enough to stop smoking myself, but I know that this is not the truth. I have proven that this is not the truth! I am looking forward to this attempt, but feel a little weird about it. I don’t want to be that raging bitch! It would be great if I could quit smoking for good. My mom and grandmother did it cold turkey, so I know that the will power is in my genes, but I LIKE to smoke. I hate everything else about it, but I LIKE doing it. I’m a conundrum, I know.
I don’t think I mentioned in my last post that; Carley was diagnosed with ADD. It makes perfect sense with all the trouble we were having over homework and school. I think she feels like it’s something to be ashamed of though because she never wants to talk about it or what it is. Every time I ask her if she wants to know a little bit about it she covers her head and mumbles no. It’s weird. I don’t necessarily want to put her on medication and recently I have heard that this condition can be helped by a simple change in diet. I know that I should be all over this, but I haven’t been. Maybe it’s my ownform of denial, I don’t know, but, I have been meaning to do some internet surfing on the subject for a week now and I just haven’t gotten around to it.
It’s my Bosses birthday on Sunday. I have always have a hard time with giving a gift to my boss. For my last 2 birthdays he gave me a TON of money as a birthday gift. I cannot afford to give him an expensive gift, so I feel retarded getting him anything. Last year I didn’t get him anything at all. Not even a card. I felt rude, but I had no idea what to do for him that wouldn’t make me look like a cheap asshole. So this year I have to get him something, and I settled on a $50 gift card to the Melting Pot. He’s never been there before, and Jamie and I loved it when we went, so I thought it would be perfect. I still feel CHEAP though. I know he knows how much he pays me, but it’s just weird to me. (Seems like this entry is filled with my weirdness today! LOL) So I am waiting for that to be delivered and that will just be his gift. Maybe I’ll make it a tradition or something so that I don’t have to think of new ideas! I’m so cheesy like that too! LOL
Well, I hope you all have a good 4th of July!
June 30, 2009
June 10, 2009
UGH! This day.....
Well today has been a really crappy day so far. I'm fairly certain it has great potential to get worse.
Some things I have looked up today at random: (Can I just say how much I enjoy Wikipedia? I really enjoy Wikipedia!)
The Almond (Prunus dulcis, syn. Prunus amygdalus Batsch., Amygdalus communis L., Amygdalus dulcis Mill.) is a species of tree of the genus Prunus, belonging to the subfamily Prunoideae of the family Rosaceae and native to the Middle East. Within Prunus, it is classified in the subgenus Amygdalus, distinguished from the other subgenera by the corrugated seed shell.
Almond is also the name of the edible and widely cultivated nut of this tree. Although popularly referred to as a nut, the almond fruit's seed is botanically not a true nut, but the seed of a drupe (a botanic name for a type of fruit).
In botany, a drupe is a fruit in which an outer fleshy part (exocarp, or skin; and mesocarp, or flesh) surrounds a shell (the pit or stone) of hardened endocarp with a seed inside. These fruits develop from a single carpel, and mostly from flowers with superior ovaries. The definitive characteristic of a drupe is that the hard, lignified stone (or pit) is derived from the ovary wall of the flower.
Other fleshy fruits may have a stony enclosure that comes from the seed coat surrounding the seed, but such fruits are not drupes.
Some flowering plants that produce drupes are coffee, jujube, mango, olive, most palms (including date, coconut and oil palms), pistachio, and all members of the genus Prunus, including the almond (in which the mesocarp is somewhat leathery), apricot, cherry, damson, nectarine, peach, and plum.
Drupes, with their sweet, fleshy outer layer, attract the attention of animals as a food, and the plant population benefits from the resulting dispersal of its seeds. The endocarp (pit or stone) is often swallowed, passing through the digestive tract, and returned to the soil in feces with the seed inside unharmed; sometimes it is dropped after the fleshy part is eaten.
Corking is a nutritional disorder in stone fruit caused by a lack of boron and/or calcium.
Many stone fruits contain sorbitol, which can exacerbate conditions such as irritable bowel syndrome and fructose malabsorption.[citation needed]
Saddle soap is a preparatory compound containing mild soap and softening ingredients such as neatsfoot oil, glycerin, and lanolin. It also contains bee's wax to protect leather. It is used for cleaning, conditioning and softening leather, particularly that of saddles and other horse tack, hence its name.
Using saddle soap
Dip a damp sponge in the saddle soap and work up a lather. Apply a light coat of the lather to the leather in small circles covering all surfaces. Frequently rinse and re-lather the sponge. Remove any build up with a damp cloth as left over soap can damage the leather. Wipe the leather dry and then treat with a leather conditioner. After using saddle soap you should clean any metal or plastic fittings. Use a stiff bristle brush to finish off suede or rough-out leathers by brushing up the nap.
See also
Mink oil leather treatment
Neatsfoot oil leather treatment
Neatsfoot oil is a yellow oil rendered and purified from the feet (but not the hooves) and shin bones of cattle. It remains liquid down to a low temperature, and is used as a conditioning, softening and preservative agent for leather. In the 18th century, it was also used medically as a topical application for dry scaly skin conditions.
Neatsfoot oil remains liquid at room temperature because the fat in animals' legs generally has a lower melting point than the body fat. This occurs because the legs and feet of such animals are adapted to tolerate and maintain much lower temperatures than those of the body core, using countercurrent heat exchange between arterial and venous blood. Because of this, neatsfoot oil remains liquid at room temperature and so can easily soak into leather.
Currently, neatsfoot oil is sometimes made from lard.[1] It is sold as neatsfoot oil in pure form, or neatsfoot oil compound, if mineral oil is added. Some brands have been shown to be adulterated with rapeseed oil, soya oil, and drying oil[2]. Pure neatsfoot oil comes in two forms: regular and cold tested. In the latter, the oil is filtered at 0 to -4°C to remove solid components, as they can lead to 'spewing' (a whitish crystalline deposit or bloom resulting from fat migration).
[3]
'Neat' in the oil's name comes from an old term for cattle, and even today the best quality neatsfoot oil still comes from the legs of calves and with no mineral oil added. "Prime neatsfoot oil" or "neatsfoot oil compound" are terms used for a blend of pure neatsfoot oil and non-animal oils, generally mineral or other petroleum-based oils. Although the "Prime" is marketed as "the saddlemaker's choice", many saddle makers actually recommend pure neatsfoot oil for leather goods, particularly saddles. Pure neatsfoot oil has superior softening and preservative properties, the addition of mineral oils often leads to more rapid decay of stitching and speeds breakdown of any adhesive materials that may have been used.
Neatsfoot oil, like other leather dressings, should not be used on important historical objects, as it will oxidize with time, and embrittle the leather even more.[4] It also may leave an oily residue that can attract dust. On newer leather, it will inevitably darken the leather, even after a single application, and thus is not a desirable product to use when maintaining a lighter shade is desired. However, for routine use on working equipment, particularly in dry climates, it is a powerful softening and conditioning agent that few modern synthetic alternatives can replace.
All things that I did not know. I am happy that I know them, but I don't think I will ever be able to use these things in a normal conversation. I may use them in a convo with my Brother, but those conversations are seldom normal and laced with large vocabulary words because he likes to stretch his vocbaulary wings. Gay boys. *SHRUG*
Some things I have looked up today at random: (Can I just say how much I enjoy Wikipedia? I really enjoy Wikipedia!)
The Almond (Prunus dulcis, syn. Prunus amygdalus Batsch., Amygdalus communis L., Amygdalus dulcis Mill.) is a species of tree of the genus Prunus, belonging to the subfamily Prunoideae of the family Rosaceae and native to the Middle East. Within Prunus, it is classified in the subgenus Amygdalus, distinguished from the other subgenera by the corrugated seed shell.
Almond is also the name of the edible and widely cultivated nut of this tree. Although popularly referred to as a nut, the almond fruit's seed is botanically not a true nut, but the seed of a drupe (a botanic name for a type of fruit).
In botany, a drupe is a fruit in which an outer fleshy part (exocarp, or skin; and mesocarp, or flesh) surrounds a shell (the pit or stone) of hardened endocarp with a seed inside. These fruits develop from a single carpel, and mostly from flowers with superior ovaries. The definitive characteristic of a drupe is that the hard, lignified stone (or pit) is derived from the ovary wall of the flower.
Other fleshy fruits may have a stony enclosure that comes from the seed coat surrounding the seed, but such fruits are not drupes.
Some flowering plants that produce drupes are coffee, jujube, mango, olive, most palms (including date, coconut and oil palms), pistachio, and all members of the genus Prunus, including the almond (in which the mesocarp is somewhat leathery), apricot, cherry, damson, nectarine, peach, and plum.
Drupes, with their sweet, fleshy outer layer, attract the attention of animals as a food, and the plant population benefits from the resulting dispersal of its seeds. The endocarp (pit or stone) is often swallowed, passing through the digestive tract, and returned to the soil in feces with the seed inside unharmed; sometimes it is dropped after the fleshy part is eaten.
Corking is a nutritional disorder in stone fruit caused by a lack of boron and/or calcium.
Many stone fruits contain sorbitol, which can exacerbate conditions such as irritable bowel syndrome and fructose malabsorption.[citation needed]
Saddle soap is a preparatory compound containing mild soap and softening ingredients such as neatsfoot oil, glycerin, and lanolin. It also contains bee's wax to protect leather. It is used for cleaning, conditioning and softening leather, particularly that of saddles and other horse tack, hence its name.
Using saddle soap
Dip a damp sponge in the saddle soap and work up a lather. Apply a light coat of the lather to the leather in small circles covering all surfaces. Frequently rinse and re-lather the sponge. Remove any build up with a damp cloth as left over soap can damage the leather. Wipe the leather dry and then treat with a leather conditioner. After using saddle soap you should clean any metal or plastic fittings. Use a stiff bristle brush to finish off suede or rough-out leathers by brushing up the nap.
See also
Mink oil leather treatment
Neatsfoot oil leather treatment
Neatsfoot oil is a yellow oil rendered and purified from the feet (but not the hooves) and shin bones of cattle. It remains liquid down to a low temperature, and is used as a conditioning, softening and preservative agent for leather. In the 18th century, it was also used medically as a topical application for dry scaly skin conditions.
Neatsfoot oil remains liquid at room temperature because the fat in animals' legs generally has a lower melting point than the body fat. This occurs because the legs and feet of such animals are adapted to tolerate and maintain much lower temperatures than those of the body core, using countercurrent heat exchange between arterial and venous blood. Because of this, neatsfoot oil remains liquid at room temperature and so can easily soak into leather.
Currently, neatsfoot oil is sometimes made from lard.[1] It is sold as neatsfoot oil in pure form, or neatsfoot oil compound, if mineral oil is added. Some brands have been shown to be adulterated with rapeseed oil, soya oil, and drying oil[2]. Pure neatsfoot oil comes in two forms: regular and cold tested. In the latter, the oil is filtered at 0 to -4°C to remove solid components, as they can lead to 'spewing' (a whitish crystalline deposit or bloom resulting from fat migration).
[3]
'Neat' in the oil's name comes from an old term for cattle, and even today the best quality neatsfoot oil still comes from the legs of calves and with no mineral oil added. "Prime neatsfoot oil" or "neatsfoot oil compound" are terms used for a blend of pure neatsfoot oil and non-animal oils, generally mineral or other petroleum-based oils. Although the "Prime" is marketed as "the saddlemaker's choice", many saddle makers actually recommend pure neatsfoot oil for leather goods, particularly saddles. Pure neatsfoot oil has superior softening and preservative properties, the addition of mineral oils often leads to more rapid decay of stitching and speeds breakdown of any adhesive materials that may have been used.
Neatsfoot oil, like other leather dressings, should not be used on important historical objects, as it will oxidize with time, and embrittle the leather even more.[4] It also may leave an oily residue that can attract dust. On newer leather, it will inevitably darken the leather, even after a single application, and thus is not a desirable product to use when maintaining a lighter shade is desired. However, for routine use on working equipment, particularly in dry climates, it is a powerful softening and conditioning agent that few modern synthetic alternatives can replace.
All things that I did not know. I am happy that I know them, but I don't think I will ever be able to use these things in a normal conversation. I may use them in a convo with my Brother, but those conversations are seldom normal and laced with large vocabulary words because he likes to stretch his vocbaulary wings. Gay boys. *SHRUG*
June 3, 2009
Pretty Lucky
Changes
Well, wow.
I was just re-reading my last few posts and thinking how things can so rapidly change. It’s interesting to re-read what I’ve written, and know how I was thinking then, and compare it to how I’m thinking now. Bizarre.
I had a moment of clarity. May 22nd was a weird day for me. I was all set to get my drink on and party with some friends and have a great time. I blame Jaeger. I did a couple shots of Jaeger and my world came crashing down around my ears.
I realized I missed my husband and my best friend. I realized that I was an Idiot for leaving. I realized that maybe the reasons I left could have been resolved before I moved out. I’m not saying that my reasons weren’t valid, because, they very much were. I’m saying that I feel like I should have handled things a little bit differently. Maybe listened a little more and not got so hung up on what I thought I needed and deserved. I was so focused on what I wasn’t getting that I didn’t see that I wasn’t giving anything either. When both people in a marriage are off in La-La Land, it’s sometimes easy to take that Divorce road. I think it’s easier, sometimes, to get divorced then it is to admit you were wrong and then put some effort into things. I don’t think that it’s this way for everyone, but I think it was my crooked way of thinking for awhile. I do know that I was convinced that moving out was the very best thing for me. However, if I had maybe stopped thinking of things in terms of “me” or “I”, and started thinking “we” and “our family” things may have gone down a different road. Both of us have a lot to work on, and I’m looking forward to our challenges, rather than fearing them.
Hindsight really is 20/20. I suppose it’s a popular saying for a reason!
Anyway, I called Jamie that night and let him know I was missing him. Unfortunately, it was very late when I had this sudden attack of clarity, so he ignored me and turned him phone off. Lucky for me, he’s a forgiving kind of guy, and he called me in the morning when he woke up. Thus begins the long process of healing our relationship and ourselves together. It’s been a little bumpy already, even last night it was a little strained, but I feel like this ordeal is something that is going to make us stronger. Only time will tell. :) I just know that I feel more myself in the last 3 weeks then I have in the last 6 months. Maybe all I really did need was a little break?
THE MOST RETARDED MAN IN THE WORLD (according to me)
My poor baby Carley. She was supposed to be spending the majority of her summer with her dad this year. They suggested it and Carley said she wanted to go so I (foolishly) let it happen. This arrangement lasted a Grand Total of 5 days. I dropped her off with them the Wednesday before Memorial Day and her dad called me Tuesday morning saying there was a problem.
They have a teeny tiny dog there. Well apparently the dog stepped on a carpet tack and yelped. Well the EVIL STEP MOTHER accused Carley of messing with the dog and yelled at her to get away from the dog. Carley's Dad stuck up for Carley and told EVIL STEP MOTHER that Carley was nowhere near the dog and that Carley didn’t do anything. According to her Dad a fight between him and ESM ensues and then she turns around and looks Carley in the face and tells Carley “Get the fuck out of my house, right now!!!!”
So I’m obviously pissed and her Dad is asking if he can bring Carley to me because she’s not allowed to be there and it’s just a huge mess. So Carley has been coming to work with me because the boys and girls club is wait listed. Poor kid.
I bought her some crafty stuff to do and I thought I would share it with you. I thought it all came out great!
Mr. Caterpillar
Mr. Dragonfly. (My favorite)
Princess
Angel Kitty
Horse Lady
And this is Carley eating a donut! LOL 
Angel Kitty
Horse Lady
Mr. Bumblebee
Mrs. Lady Bug (notice that all the other bugs are Mr.'s, LOL)
And this is Carley eating a donut! LOL
Last night we went to Tilly's and had a little Fashion Show:
This is Cowboy Jamie:
This is Skater Carley:
Pageboy Carley:
Gangsta Jamie:
Pageboy Jamie:
Bruce Willis Jamie:
He actually bought the sunglasses he's wearing. I never thought I'd see the day when Jamie bought a pair of sunglasses, let alone Aviators! I kinda like them on him though. :)
Well, Ta Ta for now!
April 10, 2009
An End
Jamie and I have talked and decided that we are going to go our separate ways. We were together for 7 years and had some really amazing times together. Most of my memories are without him though, because he was gone so often. I think that this, among other things, led to my choice to leave. I had a good marriage and I can think back on it with good feelings. I think that many people were surprised to hear of the split in the first place because we were such good friends.
It's just that it turned into only friendship for me.
I feel a little out of sorts with the way that I left. It was a change that had been happening for me for a long time, but I didn't notice it until it was way too late. The opposite side of that is that Jamie was pretty clueless. He knew that there were problems and he thought we were working on them, and I did too, until I realized that it was really just a lost cause for me.
Then there was all of the dram involved for Jamie. He had people talking in his ear about every possible reason I may have had to have done something so shocking and so drastic. People were saying that I had to have someone else, that I was just a heartless bitch, so many different things. I'm sorry that I think I have a right to be happy. Why would it take someone else to make me decide that I deserve that? I guess I should take into consideration that they have no idea who I am and were really just talking out of their asses, but I think it contributed negatively to Jamie's attitude about his whole situation.
But, it's coming to an end. The phrase "The end of an Era" keeps coming to mind for me.
I never in a million years would have thought that I would be here, in this particular position. If you had told me 6 months ago that I'd be in the middle of a divorce I would have thought you were crazy. It's amazing the things you don't see coming.
It's just that it turned into only friendship for me.
I feel a little out of sorts with the way that I left. It was a change that had been happening for me for a long time, but I didn't notice it until it was way too late. The opposite side of that is that Jamie was pretty clueless. He knew that there were problems and he thought we were working on them, and I did too, until I realized that it was really just a lost cause for me.
Then there was all of the dram involved for Jamie. He had people talking in his ear about every possible reason I may have had to have done something so shocking and so drastic. People were saying that I had to have someone else, that I was just a heartless bitch, so many different things. I'm sorry that I think I have a right to be happy. Why would it take someone else to make me decide that I deserve that? I guess I should take into consideration that they have no idea who I am and were really just talking out of their asses, but I think it contributed negatively to Jamie's attitude about his whole situation.
But, it's coming to an end. The phrase "The end of an Era" keeps coming to mind for me.
I never in a million years would have thought that I would be here, in this particular position. If you had told me 6 months ago that I'd be in the middle of a divorce I would have thought you were crazy. It's amazing the things you don't see coming.
March 19, 2009
Now to the real stuff
So this weekend was pretty fun! Lindy and I went to the bar on Friday and that wasn't all we thought it was going to be. It was actually sort of lame. Lindy and I have decided that we are in a different place then we were when we went to the bar every weekend. We used to go so that we could catch up and vent and generally get away from life at home. There isn't a need for that now, and I think we are over going to the bar. Saturday we had a party for Lindy's birthday! That was awesome fun! I really enjoy hanging out at the house with people over and just talking and laughing. It was awesome!
This coming weekend my Brother Brandon in coming into town. I have to pick him up at the airport of Saturday. He's bringing his boyfriend! Haven't met the boyfriend yet, and I am looking forward to it. Should be a pretty good kick back weekend.
I'll update on Monday, hopefully.
Oh yeah, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO LINDY ON SATURDAY!!!!
This coming weekend my Brother Brandon in coming into town. I have to pick him up at the airport of Saturday. He's bringing his boyfriend! Haven't met the boyfriend yet, and I am looking forward to it. Should be a pretty good kick back weekend.
I'll update on Monday, hopefully.
Oh yeah, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO LINDY ON SATURDAY!!!!
Who are your real "friends"?
So! It was been brought to my attention that my ranting is being used by people (or a person) as a reporting tool. Yup! You guessed right! Someone read my blog and reported to Jamie what I wrote. Now, I'm not so naive to think that Jamie couldn't have read my blog all on his own, but I do KNOW him well enough to know that he was never really interested in reading my blog AND probably forgot it even existed until this person, let's call him/her Bill, decided to remind him. I do not know who this person is, because Jamie wouldn't tell me.
So, Bill, I just want to say thank you for pretending to be my friend! Also, thank you for trying to create drama where there needn't be.
That's really all I wanted to say.
Thanks FRIEND.
So, Bill, I just want to say thank you for pretending to be my friend! Also, thank you for trying to create drama where there needn't be.
That's really all I wanted to say.
Thanks FRIEND.
March 13, 2009
WOOT!
Tonight is my first night out since "it happened". I am so very much looking forward to it. This week and last week has been nothing but drama for my friend and I. I think we have really reached our limit for drama between the two of us. It's so funny how you can go such a very long time without it, but when it rains it fucking POURS!
So, I just wanted to say: YES I AM GOING TO GO OUT AND HAVE FUN AND MEET GUYS AND FLIRT AND GET SHIT FACED!!!!!
Saturday is my BFF's birthday party, so that will be great also! TWO WHOLE NIGHTS OF ADULT ACTIVITY! YES!
Have a great and drama free weekend!
So, I just wanted to say: YES I AM GOING TO GO OUT AND HAVE FUN AND MEET GUYS AND FLIRT AND GET SHIT FACED!!!!!
Saturday is my BFF's birthday party, so that will be great also! TWO WHOLE NIGHTS OF ADULT ACTIVITY! YES!
Have a great and drama free weekend!
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