They should (in my opinion) be SHOT-
1. People that hate Chick-Fil-A- How can you hate such yummy goodness?
2. People that have an I *heart* my –insert dog/cat breed here- Ok. I get it. You love your pet. Do you have to advertise it? Really? Why?
3. People that have a SKIN or SoCal sticker on their vehicle*- Dude. You look like a douche.
4. People that hate Mayonnaise* – Enough said.
5. People that hate Facebook games* – You have a better way to be at work and have fun at the same time?
6. Girls that wear their pants tucked into their boots- Chick. You look like a douche and you are NOT a runway model.
7. People that stop inside the crosswalk line at an intersection- You do know people WALK there, right?
8. People that turn left as you are turning right- You can’t wait 2 effing seconds for me to FINISH MY TURN before you execute yours? You’re an ass hat.
9. People that don’t pay attention to the change from the red light to the green arrow- If I’m the 3rd or 4th car in line, and you’re the first and you don’t go when that light changes, you end up screwing me. I want to kick your ass.
10. People that are in the left (or Fast) lane and they are driving 5 MPH UNDER the speed limit- WTF is WRONG with YOU?!?!?
11. People that ride their bikes on the wrong side of the road- they get pissed at you because you almost hit them, because you didn’t see them- BECAUSE THEY ARE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD. I am not required to look to the right while I am making a right turn. YOU are the one that fucked up. Not me. Save the dirty looks for your mother. She should have taught you better.
12. The people at the end of the Left turn line that think it’s OK to go thru a yellow light and the 15 people that follow- FUCK YOU. YOU ARE FUCKING UP MY CHANCE TO GO.
13. People that go out and Shop on Black Friday- Are you insane?
14. Teenagers- yes all of them.
15. Parents that buy their teenage children brand new cars- Cause because you can, doesn’t mean you should. I see them driving when you are not around. You just wasted $30,000.
16. The people that use the Left lane as their turning lane- How did you get a license?
*I have friends that fall in this category. I love them, but, WHY?
So that’s my rant for today.
:) Happy Holidays! LOL
November 19, 2009
October 19, 2009
My phone
I’ve been noticing lately how much having a cell phone really changes your life.
1. I can’t go anywhere without it, and go back to get it when I leave it at home. (There are tons of different ways of getting a hold of me…. I have a perfectly good phone at work, and I also have Facebook, or email , but I NEED my phone!)
2. Speed dial has completely messed up my ability to actually manually dial a whole phone number, correctly, on my first attempt.
3. When I’m listening to the radio in my car and I hear a song I like, I think to myself…. “Hmm… I wonder what that ringtone sounds like.”
4. I laugh at people with ringers that sound like an actual phone.
5. The only reason I want an “I” or a “G” phone is so that I can have the internet everywhere I go.
6. When I ask a question to a group of my friends, and no one knows the answer, I no longer have to wait to look it up online at home. They all have “I” or “G” phones, and look it up right on the spot! (This actually happened this weekend)
7. I “butt dial” my friends more often than I intentionally call them.
8. If I am fighting with my husband over the phone and one of us hangs up, the other will, without pause, continue the fight via text message.
9. 9 times out of 10 I will include LOL in one or more text message, without actually laughing out loud. Or even smiling…..
10. I use my phone as my alarm clock.
11. The amount of contacts in my phone is not directly proportional to the amount of people I actually talk to.
:) LOL
1. I can’t go anywhere without it, and go back to get it when I leave it at home. (There are tons of different ways of getting a hold of me…. I have a perfectly good phone at work, and I also have Facebook, or email , but I NEED my phone!)
2. Speed dial has completely messed up my ability to actually manually dial a whole phone number, correctly, on my first attempt.
3. When I’m listening to the radio in my car and I hear a song I like, I think to myself…. “Hmm… I wonder what that ringtone sounds like.”
4. I laugh at people with ringers that sound like an actual phone.
5. The only reason I want an “I” or a “G” phone is so that I can have the internet everywhere I go.
6. When I ask a question to a group of my friends, and no one knows the answer, I no longer have to wait to look it up online at home. They all have “I” or “G” phones, and look it up right on the spot! (This actually happened this weekend)
7. I “butt dial” my friends more often than I intentionally call them.
8. If I am fighting with my husband over the phone and one of us hangs up, the other will, without pause, continue the fight via text message.
9. 9 times out of 10 I will include LOL in one or more text message, without actually laughing out loud. Or even smiling…..
10. I use my phone as my alarm clock.
11. The amount of contacts in my phone is not directly proportional to the amount of people I actually talk to.
:) LOL
October 15, 2009
It's really NOT what you think it is....
It’s all the rage!
You get an invite for a Baby Shower, or an Anniversary party. You go out buy your gift, pick a special outfit. You get there; you are required to pick a number.
“UM, WEIRD, I’ve never had to pick a number before…..” You pick your number and are told to get into the next room. THERE ARE NAKED PEOPLE EVERYWHERE! HOLY SHIT Y’ALL! YOU’VE BEEN INVITED TO A MANDATORY SEX PARTY! There’s nothing you can do now, so get naked and get to screwin!*
*Mandatory sex parties do not exist (to my knowledge). I’m just tryin to help a fellow Blogger out!
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-google-needs-is-mandatory-sex.html
You get an invite for a Baby Shower, or an Anniversary party. You go out buy your gift, pick a special outfit. You get there; you are required to pick a number.
“UM, WEIRD, I’ve never had to pick a number before…..” You pick your number and are told to get into the next room. THERE ARE NAKED PEOPLE EVERYWHERE! HOLY SHIT Y’ALL! YOU’VE BEEN INVITED TO A MANDATORY SEX PARTY! There’s nothing you can do now, so get naked and get to screwin!*
*Mandatory sex parties do not exist (to my knowledge). I’m just tryin to help a fellow Blogger out!
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-google-needs-is-mandatory-sex.html
October 5, 2009
September 21, 2009
Bye Tom! Good Luck!
Saturday we had what was probably the BEST going away party EVER. We’ve had a couple for Jamie that were pretty dang great, but it seems like this one was above and beyond on the fun meter. Everyone was completely obliterated drunk, and having a GREAT time. It was seriously EPIC.
We rented a VIP section at the Bar. Here’s a pic:
We rented a VIP section at the Bar. Here’s a pic:
It was pretty cool having this little room to ourselves. It was a little pricey; $150 for the room and a bottle of Skyy Vodka with unlimited Red Bull and Cranberry mixers. The bottle had a lock on it so that only our “hostess” could pour for us.
We got there early so by 9:00 PM the bottle was gone and we had to get another. It turns out that we went thru 3 bottles of vodka in one night. You may think that is a lot, but 1. You don’t know my friends, and 2. There were probably 35 to 40 if us there. It was awesome!
I can’t think of a better way to send someone to boot camp! Poor Tom was totally wasted and was ready to go home by 12:30 AM. He had a good time though and was still drunk the next day! Great send off, I think!
Even old friends that we haven’t seen in AGES showed up! Thanks to you Tracey, Alicia, and Ryan! It was great to see you!
Here are some general debauchery pictures:
(I think we may have had WAY too much fun!)
So here is my good luck to you Thomas! I hope you have a great time there and make the most out of it. It’s not every day that you get to go thru 9 weeks of hardcore kick your ass-ness!
We will all miss you!
September 17, 2009
Oh no!
I am sad.
I finally realized, today, that I am now an actual ADULT.....
There is a high school about a mile away from our office and the kids get out around now. I was out back smoking and some kids drove through the parking lot blasting loud music and generally being idiots, and all I could do was roll my eyes. I find myself rolling my eyes at those youngsters more often than not, actually.
Then it hit me. How did I become so intolerant of teenagers? I obviously used to be one! The answer…. I AM OLD NOW.
I didn’t think I was old. I’m not even 30 yet (8 months away!!!). This is just confirmation that I am going to be one of those old persons that yell at everyone for no reason.
THAT could be fun, now that I think about it.
I finally realized, today, that I am now an actual ADULT.....
There is a high school about a mile away from our office and the kids get out around now. I was out back smoking and some kids drove through the parking lot blasting loud music and generally being idiots, and all I could do was roll my eyes. I find myself rolling my eyes at those youngsters more often than not, actually.
Then it hit me. How did I become so intolerant of teenagers? I obviously used to be one! The answer…. I AM OLD NOW.
I didn’t think I was old. I’m not even 30 yet (8 months away!!!). This is just confirmation that I am going to be one of those old persons that yell at everyone for no reason.
THAT could be fun, now that I think about it.
September 11, 2009
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