December 31, 2009

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

Wow. Today is the very last day of 2009. What a crappy year! It feel like I went through so much, but then when I look back at it, it still feels like it was all yesterday. Well, I say GOOD RIDDANCE to all of it and Welcome the New Year and a new beginning.

Hopefully this year will be a good one. I am actually making a Resolution this year. It’s my first time. I guess things change as you get older, but I never thought I would ever make a Resolution. I’m going with the familiar standard resolution of exercising more often and trying to watch what I eat and drink. This week was BINGE week! LOL, but the pants are starting to get tighter and tighter and I just don’t feel healthy. So while I am reluctant to say the word DIET, that’s pretty much what I’ll be doing.

I’m ending 2009 with no job and, scarily, no prospect of a job. The bright side of this is I get to spend more time with my Family, and I have all the time in the world to Exercise. The down side is (obviously) no money.

But I am determined not to let that get me down. Plenty of people are living lean right now, and plenty of people are making it work. Cutting back for the first time in my life should be interesting, to say the least. I have always been able to live comfortably and have been able to have unnecessary amenities.

So, I say adieu to my DVR and my premium cable package. Adieu to the Victoria’s Secret credit account. Adieu (hopefully) to my gas guzzling vehicle. Adieu to having coke in the fridge constantly. Adieu to eating out. Adieu to everything awesome and unnecessary! Should be very interesting! I know my husband is going to have a hard time cutting back as well.

I hope everyone has a great New Year’s Eve and a wonderful 2010. I know that I am determined to make it a better year. When you are down at the bottom, the only way to go is up!!!

HAPPY 2010 EVERYONE!!!

December 16, 2009

Google for fun

I "borrowed" this idea from another blogger. I thought it would be fun and entertaining to see what happened with my name. Enjoy!

I Googled: Tiffany looks like.... and this is what Google came up with!

1. Tiffany looks like a fucking wildebeast!! Aaah!! That picture is scary as hell!! She looks like a drag queen. To Wong Foo, anyone? ...

2. Dec 10, 2009 ... Inside Wall Street: Tiffany looks like a gem of a stock. Gene Marcial · Gene Marcial RSS Feed Dec 10th 2009 at 8:45AM. Text SizeAAA ...

3. Tiffany says. Tiffany looks like the high school girl all high school girls ... "I'm not 14 anymore, Tiffany' Babette says. "I can't look like you." ...

4. Oct 10, 2005 ... Tiffany looks like a chipmunk in winter wear. I DO kinda like the coat…just lose the crossed over look with that big assed scarf…YIKES! ...

5. TIFFANY LOOKS LIKE KATY PERRY. taeyeooooon~!!! 19 minutes ago from web. Shawdercore. Christine Rufila. Footer. © 2009 Twitter; About Us · Contact · Blog ...

And just for shits and giggles I Googled Tiffany smells like..... amazingly I only got one post!

1. posted on Monday, Mar 31, 2008 8:41PM [Report]. Tiffany smells like Hierophat. Timoo. posted on Friday, Oct 19, 2007 2:58PM [Report]. Hi Nice to meet you ...

Can I just ask what Hierophat is? Wikipedia here I come!
Totally interseting, but too long to copy... Here's a link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hierophant

And Tiffany acts like......

1. Oct 30, 2008 ... Tiffany acts like a bitch calling the clock on a player when his TOURNAMENT LIFE and a shot at NINE MILLION DOLLARS (not pesos) was on the ...

I had to throw this one in, even though it doesn't really count....

1.5) Apr 30, 2008 ... I actually know Tiffany personally also, and YES she is a crazy evil person. She is low class and acts like white trash. ...


Tiffany Licks....

HA HA! Just kidding... I can only guess at the amount of dirty shit that would have popped up!

Just for fun... Google your name and see what happens. You might be amused!

December 15, 2009

My Subconscious is an Asshole

So last night I had a disturbing dream.
I am certain that it was a product of all of the stress I am under, but it made me feel like an asshole. I am looking for a new job because I am being laid off from my current on at the end of December. As of right this very minute I have applied for 180 positions, and I have had 2 interviews that have gone to the final level, but I have not been offered employment. Also, my husband had to go back to a job he hates so that he can get a steady source of income. That makes me feel bad. My daughter has started puberty and is acting like a maniac most of the time. So, stress is my middle name.

I dreamt about my daughter dying last night. I was (understandably) horribly crushed until I realized that I have a life insurance policy on her. Instantly (in the dream) I felt a sense of relief. I think this makes my subconscious an asshole. I would never ever be happy at the untimely death of my daughter and I know that I would feel less stressed if I wasn’t worried about money right now. So, I think that the fact that my daughter is driving me up the wall and I am uber stressed about money, made my mind put the two together. It was one of those dreams that you wake up from, only to go back to sleep and fall into the same dream again. So, all of last night was spent in dreamland crying my eyes out and feeling like a jerk wad.

I’ve also had dreams in which my husband is cheating on me and I wake up mad at him for no reason the next day. Like SUPER pissed. Then I realize I am an idiot and slowly get over it. Dreams are pretty powerful, and sometimes a little retarded.

So, what I want to know is, Have you ever had any dream that made you feel like a selfish idiot or that have made you feel something through the next day?

November 19, 2009

Yup, It's a Rant

They should (in my opinion) be SHOT-

1. People that hate Chick-Fil-A- How can you hate such yummy goodness?

2. People that have an I *heart* my –insert dog/cat breed here- Ok. I get it. You love your pet. Do you have to advertise it? Really? Why?

3. People that have a SKIN or SoCal sticker on their vehicle*- Dude. You look like a douche.

4. People that hate Mayonnaise* – Enough said.

5. People that hate Facebook games* – You have a better way to be at work and have fun at the same time?

6. Girls that wear their pants tucked into their boots- Chick. You look like a douche and you are NOT a runway model.

7. People that stop inside the crosswalk line at an intersection- You do know people WALK there, right?

8. People that turn left as you are turning right- You can’t wait 2 effing seconds for me to FINISH MY TURN before you execute yours? You’re an ass hat.

9. People that don’t pay attention to the change from the red light to the green arrow- If I’m the 3rd or 4th car in line, and you’re the first and you don’t go when that light changes, you end up screwing me. I want to kick your ass.

10. People that are in the left (or Fast) lane and they are driving 5 MPH UNDER the speed limit- WTF is WRONG with YOU?!?!?

11. People that ride their bikes on the wrong side of the road- they get pissed at you because you almost hit them, because you didn’t see them- BECAUSE THEY ARE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD. I am not required to look to the right while I am making a right turn. YOU are the one that fucked up. Not me. Save the dirty looks for your mother. She should have taught you better.

12. The people at the end of the Left turn line that think it’s OK to go thru a yellow light and the 15 people that follow- FUCK YOU. YOU ARE FUCKING UP MY CHANCE TO GO.

13. People that go out and Shop on Black Friday- Are you insane?

14. Teenagers- yes all of them.

15. Parents that buy their teenage children brand new cars- Cause because you can, doesn’t mean you should. I see them driving when you are not around. You just wasted $30,000.

16. The people that use the Left lane as their turning lane- How did you get a license?

*I have friends that fall in this category. I love them, but, WHY?

So that’s my rant for today.

:) Happy Holidays! LOL

October 19, 2009

My phone

I’ve been noticing lately how much having a cell phone really changes your life.

1. I can’t go anywhere without it, and go back to get it when I leave it at home. (There are tons of different ways of getting a hold of me…. I have a perfectly good phone at work, and I also have Facebook, or email , but I NEED my phone!)

2. Speed dial has completely messed up my ability to actually manually dial a whole phone number, correctly, on my first attempt.

3. When I’m listening to the radio in my car and I hear a song I like, I think to myself…. “Hmm… I wonder what that ringtone sounds like.”

4. I laugh at people with ringers that sound like an actual phone.

5. The only reason I want an “I” or a “G” phone is so that I can have the internet everywhere I go.

6. When I ask a question to a group of my friends, and no one knows the answer, I no longer have to wait to look it up online at home. They all have “I” or “G” phones, and look it up right on the spot! (This actually happened this weekend)

7. I “butt dial” my friends more often than I intentionally call them.

8. If I am fighting with my husband over the phone and one of us hangs up, the other will, without pause, continue the fight via text message.

9. 9 times out of 10 I will include LOL in one or more text message, without actually laughing out loud. Or even smiling…..

10. I use my phone as my alarm clock.

11. The amount of contacts in my phone is not directly proportional to the amount of people I actually talk to.

:) LOL

October 15, 2009

It's really NOT what you think it is....

It’s all the rage!

You get an invite for a Baby Shower, or an Anniversary party. You go out buy your gift, pick a special outfit. You get there; you are required to pick a number.

“UM, WEIRD, I’ve never had to pick a number before…..” You pick your number and are told to get into the next room. THERE ARE NAKED PEOPLE EVERYWHERE! HOLY SHIT Y’ALL! YOU’VE BEEN INVITED TO A MANDATORY SEX PARTY! There’s nothing you can do now, so get naked and get to screwin!*

*Mandatory sex parties do not exist (to my knowledge). I’m just tryin to help a fellow Blogger out!
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-google-needs-is-mandatory-sex.html

October 5, 2009

Wow

Ever had one of those days? I have! Today was one, in fact. I need a drink!

September 21, 2009

Bye Tom! Good Luck!

Saturday we had what was probably the BEST going away party EVER. We’ve had a couple for Jamie that were pretty dang great, but it seems like this one was above and beyond on the fun meter. Everyone was completely obliterated drunk, and having a GREAT time. It was seriously EPIC.
We rented a VIP section at the Bar. Here’s a pic:



It was pretty cool having this little room to ourselves. It was a little pricey; $150 for the room and a bottle of Skyy Vodka with unlimited Red Bull and Cranberry mixers. The bottle had a lock on it so that only our “hostess” could pour for us.

We got there early so by 9:00 PM the bottle was gone and we had to get another. It turns out that we went thru 3 bottles of vodka in one night. You may think that is a lot, but 1. You don’t know my friends, and 2. There were probably 35 to 40 if us there. It was awesome!

I can’t think of a better way to send someone to boot camp! Poor Tom was totally wasted and was ready to go home by 12:30 AM. He had a good time though and was still drunk the next day! Great send off, I think!




Even old friends that we haven’t seen in AGES showed up! Thanks to you Tracey, Alicia, and Ryan! It was great to see you!

Here are some general debauchery pictures:
(I think we may have had WAY too much fun!)

So here is my good luck to you Thomas! I hope you have a great time there and make the most out of it. It’s not every day that you get to go thru 9 weeks of hardcore kick your ass-ness!
We will all miss you!









September 17, 2009

Oh no!

I am sad.

I finally realized, today, that I am now an actual ADULT.....

There is a high school about a mile away from our office and the kids get out around now. I was out back smoking and some kids drove through the parking lot blasting loud music and generally being idiots, and all I could do was roll my eyes. I find myself rolling my eyes at those youngsters more often than not, actually.

Then it hit me. How did I become so intolerant of teenagers? I obviously used to be one! The answer…. I AM OLD NOW.

I didn’t think I was old. I’m not even 30 yet (8 months away!!!). This is just confirmation that I am going to be one of those old persons that yell at everyone for no reason.

THAT could be fun, now that I think about it.

September 11, 2009

It was THIS close!

This morning I almost Sharted.



That is all.

September 9, 2009

ADD update

We started Carley on ADD medication on the 9th of August so it's been exactly a month today. Things have been going really well for Carley. She's feeling better, she's able to focus more, she's getting better grades, she's finishing her homework in class and she just in a way better mood. I attribute the better mood to her not getting in trouble as often as she used to. She still gets yelled at every once in awhile, but it's nothing like it used to be. Because of her attitude change she and I have has the best relationship we've had in about a year. We actually like each other again. It's amazing to me. I'm happy that it's working and she's happy and therefore we are all happy! There have been a few side effects I've noticed, but they are calming down now that she's adjusting to the medication. The benefits greatly out way the side effects in this situation.
So happy is a great thing.

argh! I'm back.....

Vegas was a blast! We had a great weekend. It totally felt like non-stop fun.

Saturday was our recovery day, but Saturday night we went right back out and got our party on! Sunday was a little miserable, with the drive, and Monday was worse because I had a whole weekend of stuff to do in one day.

So, I actually got a Vacation, but it didn't really feel like I got any time off. We were going, going, going all weekend.

Monday we started putting our new shed together. I had NO IDEA what a pain the the behind that was going to be! Wow, if they could make the instructions any more confusing! There were probably 200 screws in a bag and we got 3 bags of them! So that took a few hours of our Monday morning, and then we had a few people over for a BBQ and our weekend was done!

I really didn't want to come back to work on Tuesday. I think I need to win the lottery, start my own business and find someone to run it for me. Then I could pop in and work when I want to, and if I don't.... all the better. I think I would probably start an arcade, or a nail salon. I have always said that if I won the lottery I would build a super cool, super cheap bar, but I think that would be too much work for what I have in mind. LAZINESS!

Thank goodness for the short week after a holiday though. HOWEVER, I have to start working every other Saturday. It's only for 3 hours, but that I think makes it worse. I work from 9:00 AM to Noon, so my whole morning is shot. On the plus side, I get to take off 3 hours early during the week. Still, the thought of actually getting up to come to work on a SATURDAY is disturbing. I reiterate my need to win the lottery. Good bye Saturday and Sunday working. Although, I'm sure I would have a better chance at winning the lottery if I actually played it. I never know what numbers to choose. Birthdays?..... That's really all I got. Oh well, a girl can dream I suppose.

Here's hoping that YOU don't have to work Saturday's. If you do, I'm feelin your pain! If you work Sunday's, I am truely sorry for your loss. :)

Later!

September 2, 2009

I plead the 5th

Anniversaries are funny things. They mean something different to everyone or every couple.

Tomorrow is our 5th wedding anniversary. We thought that the 5th year was a pretty big deal, but according to my friends, they either did nothing, or have been married so long they don’t remember what they did.

So Jamie and I are heading out of Las Vegas for the BIG 5! I am so excited! I need this break!

But, thinking about this anniversary got me wondering about what gift I was going to give him. Did I want to go traditional, or modern? While I was looking for what type of gift to give him I ran across a website that lists the traditional and modern gifts, and thought some of them were quite interesting!

Here are the ones I like the most:

1st year-

Traditional: Paper

Modern: Plastic/Clock

I actually followed the traditional path for our first anniversary and got him a message in a bottle. It was pretty cool. I came is a wooden crate and the bottle was filled with a romantic message and had sand and little sea shells in it.

Plastic seems like a lame gift to give someone. Here, babe, it’s a swatch watch! Happy Anniversary, Love you. LOL. I ended up going with the clock idea for our second anniversary. It was a pretty clock, and looked modern as well.

5th Year-

Traditional: Wood

Modern: Silverware

I sort of followed the traditional gift when I got Jamie his gift this year. I included a little wooden heart with a message scroll in the basket, but that was all that was wooden. I don’t think I would want silverware. That’s like saying: “Honey, get your ass in that kitchen and serve me some grub!”

8th year-

Traditional: Bronze

Modern: Appliance

Either way I think we lose out on this gift giving year. Bronze is so 1970 and an appliance is just lame. Well, to me it’s lame. I could probably get Jamie some sort of appliance for his cars and he would be happy.

10th year-

Traditional: Tin

Modern: Aluminum

Another crap year! I really wonder who decided that Tin and Aluminum were great gifts on your 10th anniversary?

Here’s an interesting fact: For years 16 through 19 there were no traditional gifts. It’s like they didn’t think any marriage was going to last, but then the tradition starts up again at 20. However, at 20 years the increments go to 30 and then do every 5 years. EX: 30 years, 35 years, 40 years, all the way to 60 and then skip to 75 and end there. At least that was all the information I could find about it. Towards the end the gifts start getting smaller but more expensive. They mostly consist of jewels and Gold.

I just thought it was interesting how we haven’t changed all that much in the way of gift giving, and how 2 people who know each other so well can have no clue what to get one another and have to resort to looking up what’s traditional and what’s modern.

So, we are going to take a trip to Las Vegas to celebrate. There will be much love, drinking, and laughing. I think it's the perfect way to get away with your other half. We have, very much, been looking forward to it.

Oh yeah, so I ended up getting him a basket filled with romantic things for our weekend, and he got me a car stereo and speakers! I have been wanting that for AGES. Thanks love!

Laters!

August 17, 2009

I concur!

Got this email from a friend today. I have to say that I agree with 90% of it!
Funny Stuff!

Random Thoughts of the Day:

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.

Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

There is a great need for sarcasm font.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the fuck was going on when I first saw it.

I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

The other night I hit a new low at an open bar. I had already hopped on highway blackout when, inevitably I had to find a bathroom. Eventually I decided it was probably on the other side of the bar so I tried to walk over there, but ran into a guy coming the other way. We played that, Both go left, Both go right game to no avail, so I finally put out my hand to guide myself past and that's is when I realized, yup, that's a mirror I just tried to walk through. And the guy on the other side is me. Even cats can recognize their own image.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.

Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

I think that if, years down the road when I'm trying to have a kid, I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.

Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

August 14, 2009

Silly Rabbit, Rules are for NERDS

ADD

We started Carley on ADD meds last Sunday and I am so impressed with the improvement they have made with her anger and bad attitude!! It’s like a totally different kid in there! She seems so much happier now too. She keeps saying (with a little bit of awe) “Mom, I haven’t gotten in trouble at all this week!” So that has been going really well, and I hope that it continues into this new school year.

Speaking of……

Oh Man! It’s back to school time already! Seems like time flies so much when you are an adult. We went to Carley’s meet the teacher night last night and we told of some very interesting changes in the school program.

Field Trips-

From now on if any parent wants to go on a school field trip, they have to take a Parent Volunteer Class. It’s a 30 minute class and it’s good for 5 years, but I am wondering if I agree with it or not. I suppose it really doesn’t matter because I’m going to have to do it anyway. One half of me feels like this is probably a good thing, because not all parents have it altogether. There are some parents that just shouldn’t have kids, but do those types of parents really go on field trips as chaperones? Then the other half of me is sort of insulted that they think I need to take a class to walk around the zoo with 5 kids. Well, like I said I suppose it really doesn’t matter cause I have to take the class.

Classroom Snacks-

The Arizona Health Department has stepped in and decided that all treats brought into the classroom now have to include at least 1 gram of Fiber. WHAT THE HELL? This is possibly the most retarded rule I have ever heard of! So not only do I have to bring in STORE bought items, NOW they have to have FIBER. I can bring in RAISINS for my kids birthday. This potential ruins all in school parties and functions forever! I wholeheartedly disagree with this new rule. If I was Calvin I would be on my truck’s back window pissing on this rule. Do we have to ruin EVERYTHING fun about school?

Sharing-

They are sharing PE, Music, and Art teachers with another school. Don’t even get me started on the budget cuts issue though. GRRR…

So aside from all of this crappiness, I got to meet Carley’s new teacher. She seems very nice. But, really... would she come off as bitchy when we are meeting her for the first time? Probably not. She’s a sports fanatic, so that’s going to be a bit of a change for Carley. Hopefully it will get her into sports or some outdoor activities a little more.

Carley has a student teacher in her classroom this year, and it just so happens that I went to school with this girl. I think she graduated the year after me. So that was a little bit of a trip.

I also think it’s crazy how many friends my daughter has! We were walking thru the school and she’s constantly saying hello to people and all of her little girlfriends are running up to her and squealing and such. It’s so funny how quickly you forget that school is cliques and groups and silly girls and boy trying to act cool. Ah, to be 10 again. LOL

So Monday is the big day for Carley. She said she wasn’t excited, but once she got to the school and saw all her friends and got the supply list she was raring to go. This makes me happy.

Ass Hat-
(or one more thing that pisses me off endlessly)

On the “Father” front; Carley mentioned that she wants to start going back to her Dad’s house again and that she would just deal with her evil step mom. I discussed it with Jamie and he said that if she wants to go, we should let her. So she is going over there this weekend. I’m not sure how I feel about it except that I want to rip her stepmom’s head off still.

I’m torn between recognizing a lost cause when I see one, knowing that she really doesn’t care how I feel, and talking to her about what happened. I know that if I start a conversation about it, it will just turn into an argument, so I’m leaning towards just leaving the issue lie. BUT, I really hate her. I really, really want to punch her in the face… repeatedly. *SIGH* I guess I will just save my hatred up until the day Carley turns 18 and then I will unleash it. It should be glorious.

Until then... I will just beat my husband. He quite enjoys it. LOL

Later!

July 23, 2009

Weekend Fun and Monday Sadness

Stinky!
I have been trying to update since last Monday!!!! I was in the process of writing a new post when I found out that my Kitty had been killed over the weekend last weekend. :( It was a very sad day for my husband and I. Stinky was our first cat together. She earned her name when we first picked her up from the human society. She had a terrible upper respiratory infection and she stank to high heaven. So Jamie decided that Stinky should be her name and it just stuck! She was a great cat. I had her when Jamie was in training for his job and he was away all the time. She would sleep with me every night. This was a cat the cuddled!!! She was a whiney bitchy cat, but most cats are and I loved her dearly. It makes my heart heavy for her to be gone.

R.I.P. Stinky. I love you!


Vacation!!


I had a fantastic vacation! Jamie and I went to Minnesota for a Marriage Enrichment. It's great stuff they teach us, and everything is paid for! We had a big 'ole blast up there. There's not much to do, but we found enough fun for 20 people! LOL

We flew in on Thursday and checked into the hotel. This Hotel was decent but not worth what Jamie's work paid for it, that's for sure! Here's a picture of our window in our room-

Yup! That little sliver of light was our window! Even better was the view! All we could see was the Roof! Terrible! Totally not worth the money paid. I would have been mad if we had had to pay out of pocket, that's for sure! This is what the weather looked like all weekend too! It was a cold 65 degrees and sunny when we got there Thursday, but by Friday it was in the 50's and cloudy! For sure a change from our 115 degrees!!




So we checked in and got ready and went downtown. Jamie made us Dinner reservations at a Brazilian Steakhouse. LET ME TELL YOU!!!! If you EVER have the chance to eat at a Brazilian Steakhouse, TAKE IT! This was probably the most fabulous dinner I have ever had!


This is Directly from the Website-


Dining Experience
Step 1: Sit down, relax, and enjoy a drink while we explain the Fogo® dining experience.
Step 2: Visit our gourmet salad and sides bar. Enjoy over 30 items including fresh cut vegetables, imported cheeses, cured meats and Brazilian side dishes.
Step 3: Turn your card green side up, signaling that you are ready for our gaucho chefs to begin tableside service.
Step 4: Choose from the 15 cuts of delectable fire roasted meats that are brought to your table, sliced, and served by our gaucho chefs. (They all walk by your table with Meat on skewers and offer you what they have. It was amazing!)
Step 5: When you are satisfied, flip the disc to the red side until you are ready for more offerings.
Step 6: If you wish, end the meal with one of our delicious desserts.


These are all of the different types of meats they have-


pea-CAN-ya
Our signature steak, Picanha is a prime cut of top sirloin. The picanha cut is very popular in the churrascarias of Southern Brazil. At Fogo de Chão, our gaucho chefs carefully carve each piece, just as the gauchos before them have done for hundreds of years.
Fogo® prepares picanha two different ways. We offer the traditional light seasoning, and a more robust garlic seasoned version. Both are equally delicious and grilled to juicy perfection.

fil-AY min-YON
Filet mignon is known as the most tender of cuts. At Fogo, our gaucho chefs expertly prepare your filet mignon from the most flavorful part of the beef tenderloin. Once seasoned, the filet is grilled to perfect tenderness.
For those who prefer filet mignon wrapped in bacon, Fogo® offers a delicious bacon-wrapped version. Each delectable piece is seasoned lightly and grilled rotisserie style.

beef AN-cho
Beef ancho is cut from the prime part of the rib eye. The beautiful marbling on the rib eye provides its superb flavor, juiciness and texture, making this one of the most popular steaks at Fogo®.
The gaucho chefs know that such a finely marbled cut of beef needs a light hand when it comes to seasoning. They apply just a touch before grilling the steak, rotisserie style.

al-CAT-ra
Alcatra is a special cut of top sirloin originating in the steakhouses of Southern Brazil. Like picanha, alcatra is a popular cut in Brazil. The gaucho chefs at Fogo® custom cut each piece of alcatra for our guests.
Many of our Brazilian-trained gaucho chefs hone their skills in our restaurants in Brazil before coming to the United States. It is there they learn to properly cut alcatra, season it lightly, and grill it to delicious perfection.

fral-DIN-ya
In Brazil, bottom sirloin is called fraldinha. Though it may be difficult to pronounce, you will enjoy the taste of fraldinha. Because of the strong marbling characteristics, fraldinha has an unmatched juiciness and robust flavor. Whenever people gather on a farm in Southern Brazil to enjoy churrasco (bbq), fraldinha is sure to be on the grill.
Fraldinha is one of the most distinctive and flavorful cuts of meat from Southern Brazil. At Fogo, our gaucho chefs hand select and grill each piece of fraldinha before carving it tableside for our guests.

co-STELL-a
Tender, juicy beef ribs expertly prepared by the gaucho chefs at Fogo®. These fall-off-the-bone ribs are first lightly seasoned. Then they are grilled for several hours to capture their rich natural flavor.
A favorite in Southern Brazil, our gaucho chefs proudly offer costela to Fogo’s North American guests as well.

cor-DAY-roo
Cordeiro is how Brazilians say fresh lamb. And Fogo® is known for our savory preparation of cordeiro.
The gaucho chefs at Fogo de Chão® offer guests both succulent lamb chops and tender leg of lamb, imported from New Zealand. Each is gently flavored with our special fresh mint marinade, perfectly grilled and served tableside.

FRAHN-go
In Brazil, frango means chicken. Following the tradition of the churrascarias of Rio Grande do Sul in Southern Brazil, Fogo’s gaucho chefs prepare frango two different ways. Guests may enjoy chicken legs lightly basted in our special marinade. Or, savor our bacon wrapped chicken breasts kissed with a hint of seasoning.

co-STELL-a gee PO-co
Mouthwatering baby back pork ribs skillfully roasted by Fogo’s Brazilian-trained gaucho chefs. A favorite in the churrascarias of Southern Brazil, the secret to costela de porco at Fogo de Chão® is the seasoning. A careful blend of our wet and dry rub keep the ribs tender and enhance their natural flavor.
LOM-bo
Another house specialty from Southern Brazil, the gaucho chefs at Fogo de Chão® start by hand selecting the finest pork loin available. The pork loin is sliced into filets and encrusted with a rich Parmesan cheese coating before roasting over an open flame. The result is a unique and delectable flavor.
lin-GWEE-sa
Linguica is a Brazilian-style, cured pork sausage. The sausage originated in Portugal, and gained popularity in Brazil during colonial times. At Fogo, our linguica is flavored with our own special blend of seasonings, created to complement the many flavors of churrasco (bbq).
Brazilian linguica is known for its wonderfully robust flavor. The gaucho chefs at Fogo® prepare linguica on the rotisserie until the outside is perfectly crisp and the inside is hot and juicy. For centuries, linguica has been an integral part of the churrascaria experience.

All of these cuts of meat were amazing!!! There was some chicken in there too, but I don't see it on this menu. Anyway, it was the cream of the crop as far as meats go. AND, not only do they have all of these meats, but they have a Salad Bar and Side Dishes to go with it all!!! Needless to say Jamie and I were stuffed by the time we got out of there. It was awesome.

Before dinner we had drinks at a place called Sneaky Pete's (yes babes, you were right) and that was a cool little bar. Well we ened up going back there after we ate and had a TOTAL BLAST!!!!!



This was our bartender posing with one of our cards. She was SO friendly.



We are such goof balls!





Friday and Saturday we went to The Mall of America. It's a CRAZY place.




You go in this entrance and go up the escaltor and the first thing you see at the top is this Carousel! They have an entire amusement park in the middle of the mall!




Here is the log ride. It goes right up next to the side of the 3rd floor. It's crazy looking over a blaconey at this!


We went up the the 4th floor and they have a Cantina there and Jamie got this burrito. The biggest burrito I have ever seen!





Saturday we went back to the mall and went to Bubba Gumps. After that we went next door and hung out at Kokomo's and they have these little Tiki guys everywhere. Cute!



So all in all it was a great vacation. This last Saturday we had a birthday party for our Friend Tom. That was a lot of fun, but my Camera wasn't charged and I couldn't find the charger, so I don't have any pictures!

Anyway, I'm glad I finally got this post up, and I'm sure I'll have another update for you shortly.


TTYL

July 10, 2009

I'm whiney

I have a skinny person dilemma. Believe you me; I am not trying to illicit sympathy. I just wanna bitch about something and this has been on my mind for awhile. SO for all of you that hate skinny people whining about our problems, please tune out for this installment.
My dilemma: I have some parts that have developed into adult size clothing, and some that are still stuck on Junior.
To explain- My waist is Junior and my Thighs are Adult. My boobs are junior but my upper arms are adult. This makes it pretty hard for me to find comfortable clothing!
I cannot buy long sleeve junior shirts or sweaters. Apparently my upper arms are all about the adulthood cause the matured WAY before the rest of me! This isn’t as much of a problem for me as pants are though.
I have on a pair of jeans that are a size 5* in juniors. Apparently when you are a junior’s size 5* your thighs are TEENY TINY! My jeans bunch unattractively when I walk and I have to wear a belt, otherwise I’ll be advertising my crescent to everyone. Even with a belt I have to pull my pants up when I stand up or they bunch and I look like I dropped a load in my pants!
Why not skip the junior pants? Well it’s because I am a size 2 in women’s. Have you ever tried to find a size 2 in women’s? Almost impossible. Not to mention that when I buy a size 2 pant, they are hanging off of me. Then I have a height issue. I cannot go to your regular department store and buy pants b/c they end up being high waters after one wash. SO I have to order them. The only websites that make pants with an inseam long enough for a Sasquatch are Junior’s websites! These websites are the bane of my existence. They are expensive and the clothes are made for the smallest teenagers imaginable! Like you seriously have to be a size Zero to fit into a size 3 made by them! SO I have to guess at what size I need to order and then if they don’t fit I have to pay to ship them back! It’s really irritating.
*so yeah you guessed it, my size 5’s are actually a size 7 on the label.
Don’t even get me started on trying to buy Dress Pants!! Every pair of dress pants I own has the hem taken out of them b/c they are never long enough!

So, hate me or sympathize…. Doesn’t matter. I just wanted to bitch about it.

July 6, 2009

Pissed

Things that piss me off:

- Mondays
- Being asked to select one to continue in English. Since when is English a secondary language? Shouldn't I have to select one if I want to continue in Spanish?
- Even having a continue in Spanish selection for companies based in the USA
- Tuesdays
- Automated phone menus that are voice response. They ALWAYS react to some damn background noise!
- People that drive minus 2 MPH over speed bumps. Really? Are you serious? Also, a special ‘WTF, are you a retard?’ to the people that do this in their 4WD vehicles. I hate you with a passion and someday I will run one of you over.
- Wednesdays
- People that are waiting to cross as you drive thru a parking lot and don’t acknowledge that you made a special stop just for their fat asses to cross. A nice wave, or a head nod is all I’m asking. YES, I CAN RUN YOU OVER IF I CHOOSE. Douche bags.
- Scary movies that are rated PG-13. Please! Don’t bother making them cause we all know that they are going to be retarded and geared for teenagers. Yuck.
- Thursdays
- People that get pissed off that they are being solicited by our company. Maybe you didn’t take economics 101, but that’s how companies MAKE MONEY. There are plenty of people out there that will buy our stuff from a postcard, but we are supposed to know that YOU are too good to get shanghaied into buying our stuff. We are supposed to be psychic? I don’t mind that you request to be removed from our list, but don’t curse at me, ok?
- Friday’s until 5PM. Then Fridays are the best.
- Customers that think they know more about insurance then I do. Whatever.
- Commercials in the movies. Enough said.


Let me know if you have anything that pisses you off.

Vacation!

Our vacation was fabulous! We had the best time! It was very relaxing and it was totally what we needed. We went to the beach, met up with friends, enjoyed the weather and went to Knott’s Berry Farm. That was a bunch of fun, and they gave us a 50% discount for the military!

Here are some pictures:



This was on the way home. The pictures are backwards, because I was lazy and didn't want to put them in order.

Carley got a little bored on the way home and grabbed the camera.






I took this one. She's such a ham!





These palm trees get me every time we go to Cali. I don't understand why they would plant them like this and then let them die! I wonder about it every time I see them, so this time I decided to take pictures of them.




My fantastic beach sand animals!





Jamie was sleepy!




Crazy ride! it was fun!






Jamie and Carley on the bumper cars



They played dead! You can't really see it but they both had their tongues stickin out! CUTE!


Our toes in the sand.





This picture I took last second. It was just sitting on the ground. You don't see this very often!


Carley was trying to chase the ducks in the pond by our hotel.


Carley and Jamie in the Spa at the hotel.


We stopped for breakfast on the way to Cali. Yum!

Jamie driving us to Cali


This is Max (left) and Sam (right). Sam is our dog and Max is Tom's dog.


This is my cat stinky. How she got her name is a long story and I'll have to tell you later.



This is Felix. We call him Fee or Feester.

Stinky makes a good sandwich board.


And this is Carley and I on our roller coaster ride. I think I was more freaked then she was!! LOL